A Note On Forgiveness

forgivemenot

As humans I find we get really accustomed to forgiving. It’s one of those things you learn as a kid, when someone says they’re sorry- we say “it’s okay!” As I’ve learned in my life, it’s not always that simple and some people just don’t deserve forgiveness (at which point you give ’em a swift boot out of your life and move along). However what I’ve been thinking about lately is forgiving yourself. I’ve forgiven myself for tons of things, like forgetting to bring a crucial prop onstage during a performance, spilling champagne down the front of my graduation dress, laughing at a cats funeral, being hung over in Vatican City, baby talking my cat, my Junior High Nexopia account, upside down wall twerking in front of all my teachers, melting a deep fryer, cutting my own bangs, drinking coffee until I jitter, throwing my retainer in the garbage at subway and for never learning the Single Ladies dance like I promised myself I would… But the thing I’m really struggling with is forgiving myself for my car accident back in October. It weighs heavy on my brain all the time. It’s a weird feeling, because if someone else caused me that kind of distress I would be so angry with them.. But it was me who did it and it’s very strange being angry with yourself over something you can’t fix. I’ve been looking for the words to wrap this up on a positive note but maybe the positivity just comes from being open and honest and throwing the thought out into the universe that I am sorry- and hoping for a more at peace brain in the future. xox, Happy Thursday!

[Left, Middle, Right]

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